and that cake is what I had a slice of tonight.>>
god i'm so fucking fat. fatfatfatfatFAT. i had a slice of cake and a fucking huge plate of chinese food tonight at a birthday party. i have no control. my stomach is continuing to expand. i cant stand myself.
and then i have to go take it out on my wonderful boyfriend, who does nothing but pamper and love me. i am the fattest, most undeserving person ever. i can't believe I've been eating so FUCKING MUCH. my weight is creeping up and it's fucking with my fucking life. i hate people, i hate myself, i just don't give a shit anymore. i'm NOT EATING TOMORROW.. and if i do it's because my Parents (the evil ones that create this sort of hell where they police me on my food and feelings. bitches) force me to. i refuse to lose control anymore. i'm going to look like one of those obese girls someday if i eat like this. i will. i see them at school every day, licking lollipops and talking about sex and eating twix peanut butter bars while i sit in the corner and glare at them, either completely jealous that they can be happy with no control or terrified i'll end up like them.
if i eat something, i'll eat everything, so i eat nothing.
i'm sorry, i hate bitching. i HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE BITCH. god i'm stupid for doing it. wait...that's me bitching, again. i'm just going to shut the fuck up now.
happy fucking March 8th, world.
xx
Sasha Roe
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